George Ownes is a dweeb. The Indianapolis man decided to demonstrate his vitality by jogging through downtown Indianapolis and wanted to show women he was an urban Tarzan. George was extra horned out and figured if women saw his manliness physical and incredible attributed he would take one home Monday Night. When running around the bars didn't get him attention he started scaling light posts in more bizarre neurotic behaviorism of animal display. George was climbing like a Gorilla and monkey on poles and wanted to mate but women looked at him like he was bananas. Police were called out to get this eccentric fuck out of the area and he ducked into Ball and Biscuit bar where my friend Paddy bartends. He makes about three times the tips I do over at the Itasca Inn on Irving Park Road behind Tree Guys Pizzeria and we talk about once a week. he had seen this nut in his spandex shorts run into the bar and alerted security at the bar. George was back into the street after squeezing some ladies asses in the bar.
Owens was quickly pinned down by police and these actions of Owens who described them as is displays of energy in evolutionary displays of mating calls for females. Just last months this Neanderthal had grabbed a woman's breast that he thought was on display like some watermelon in a supermarket. Marion County officials have charged him with misdemeanor battery and he is being held on five hundred dollars bail and one must wonder how many more light sentences this George of the jungle will get slapped on his wrist before people in downtown Indianapolis realize what a dangerous quake this guy is starting to evolve into. 
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